Ducky: I don’t like the hat, Daddy.
Me: I know, Ducky. Thanks for putting up with it so we could get a good Christmas picture.
Ducky: You’re welcome. It’s not awful. It’s just not great.
Me: I appreciate you resisting the temptation to be hyperbolic.
Me: It means…
Ducky: I know what it means.
Ducky: I think being hyperbolic is the single worst thing anyone could ever do in the entire history of the universe ever.
Ducky: See, that’s funny because hyperbole…
Me: Yes, I know why that was funny.
Me: Anyway, we’re almost done.
Ducky: I figured it wouldn’t last that long. Bad things never do.
Ducky: Hadn’t you noticed?
Me: I guess I hadn’t.
Ducky: You had some bad things going on for a while.
Ducky: But it seems like since the last time this tree was up, things have been pretty good.
Me: Yeah. All things being considered it was a very good year.
Ducky: Sorry you had to wear an annoying hat or two for awhile there.
Ducky: Metaphorically speaking.
Ducky: A metaphor is…
Me: I know what a metaphor is, Ducky. And I get it. We had some tough years recently .
Ducky: And even some “hat-like” moments more recently.
Ducky: But eventually the hat always comes off.
Me: So put up with the hat as best as you can and when it finally comes off…
Ducky: Put it behind you and focus on the treats you’re about to get.
Me: Yeah. The “treats” being all the good things in your life.
Ducky: Or actual, non metaphorical treats.
Me: Sounds like a good way of looking at things. Thanks for taking care of me. I love you, Ducky.
Ducky: Thanks for taking care of me. And I love you too, Daddy.
Me: Ducky want a treat?
Me: An actual treat?
Ducky: Sounds goods.
Me: Sorry about the hat
Ducky: What hat?
Me: Merry Christmas, Ducky.
Ducky: Merry Christmas, Daddy.
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