Which upsets you more?
A) Joan stands accused of a crime. She is guilty. But she is found innocent and goes unpunished.
B) Mary stands accused of a crime. She is innocent. But she is found guilty and is sentenced as such.
I have always felt passionately that there is no greater injustice than someone being wrongly convicted of a crime. But more and more I feel like I am out of sync with most people. Conservatives probably find me to be a bleeding heart who doesn’t give cops the deference they deserve. Liberals probably see me as a victim blamer when I start talking about presumption of innocence and burden of proof even in cases where the victim has suffered greatly.
I truly and unashamedly can say I would rather one hundred guilty individuals go free than have one innocent individual be convicted.
Am I as out there as it feels sometimes?
See, Senator Rubio? I can use Twitter to lower the level of political discourse in the country too! #twitter #politics #america #rubio
So when that uncle of yours starts ranting about traditional American institutions being corrupted, just show him the clip of “Kinky Boots” in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and watch his head explode.
If you’re using the 50th anniversary of the March On Washington and Martin Luther King’s “I Have A Dream” speech to make racial jokes, defend George Zimmerman, and mock Al Sharpton you aren’t necessarily a racist and a douche bag.
But you are acting like one. So, what’s the phrase I’m looking for? Oh yeah. Fuck you.
The Food Channel became so quickly flooded with responses to the Deen debacle that they posted a response on their website titled, “For Those Who Love Paula Deen”:
"Attention all those who love Paula Deen. We’ve been getting your emails. Your phone calls. We’re pretty sure the good old fashioned mail will soon follow. We get that you are mad about her contract not being renewed. The problem is, you are calling and writing the wrong people…. We are not owned by Scripps. We are independently owned…. So, the best we can do is point you to the Scripps Television Network snail mail address….
From an article at csmonitor.com explaining that people are flooding “The Food Channel” website even though they are completely unaffiliated with “The Food Network.” Yup. Why take sixty seconds to confirm that you have the right target? Just start boycotting.
Shockingly, evidence continues to mount that Paula Deen’s most passionate supporters are morons.
So, are there actually people who know what the hell they’re doing with their lives and are content or are creatures like that just myths? Because I feel like I could say, ‘I understand they’re doing a new fantasy epic featuring a leprechaun, two unicorns, and Larry, a forty year old middle manager who will be able to retire at sixty five and who doesn’t go to sleep at night being slowly eaten away at by regret and fear,’ and people would go, ‘I can buy into leprechauns and unicorns but that happy manager guy? Come on!’
Cancer patients not having access to medications they need, not important enough to spur action.
But travel delays? We will not ABIDE that assault!
I am done. So disgusted.
I don’t know who invented the “Coke Freestyle” machine but I feel confident they never stood behind the average American at a regular soda fountain. We can’t efficiently manage eight choices, much less 800.
The customers who are confronted with the machines at most places I visit interact with them the way the proto-human hominids at the beginning of “2001: A Space Odyssey” interacted with the monolith. They’re scared and tentative at first, then have a moment of clarity, and finally club the manager with their cup before throwing it in the air accompanied with a mighty yawp!
More insight into why television news sucks
Producer: You are an incredibly well informed and articulate expert on a topic of great importance to our viewers. Would you please come on our show?
Expert: I'd be glad to. I think I can provide exactly the right information and context in less than sixty seconds.
Producer: 'Kay. We're gonna need you to stretch that out. But don't worry. Our hosts will ask you to irresponsibly speculate and will create a climate where you need to respond to mindless hypotheticals. Just take your time and say every single thing that pops into your mind.
Producer: Just whatever you do, never stop talking.
Expert: 'Kay. Won't that just dilute the key messages and lessen the chance that your audience gains the greater understanding of the key insights they need?
Producer: You're adorable.