New Ducky Posts Every Sunday At wellthatsjustducky!

wellthatsjustducky:

Me: Hey, Duck. I’ve got some news. The Lady is going to move in with us.

Ducky: Really? I thought your relationship was on hold until she was out of middle school. 

Me: …

Ducky: Does her guidance counselor approve?

Me: Ha, ha. She’s not that young.

Ducky: Didn’t you get her pajamas with feet for Christmas? 

Me: …

Ducky: …

Me: She’s young at heart.  

Ducky: Most tweens are.

Me: Are you done?

Ducky: Nope.

Me: Anyway, you like her so it should be all good.

Ducky: Oh, sure. And after three years of posts about depression and divorce you’ll have a whole new life experience to use as inspiration for the lies you tell on our blogs.

Me: …

Ducky: Oh, sorry, the “stories” you tell on our blogs. Not that you would ever let someone move in just…

Me: You’re full of beans tonight.

Ducky: Yeah. I’m just in a good mood. We’re back in the house, I’m healthy, you’re less mopey. It’s nice to have a little stability and to know life is going to be drama free for awhile.

Me: …

Ducky: What?

Me: Um, she’s not coming alone.

Ducky: She’s bringing that dog?

Me: No…not the dog.

Ducky: Pediatrician?

Me: …

Ducky: …

Me: She’s bringing the cat.

Ducky: …

Me: But hey, you’ll have a whole new life experience to..

Ducky: AIIIIIIGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!